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"Big" Dan Pischedda

Mighty Shane 3-2 Red Lions: Lions Lose Their Roar as Shane Inflict the Pain


Zachary Paruch scored twice including the winning goal as Shane put last week’s defeat firmly behind them with a resounding victory over last season’s runaway champions Red Lions in a fiercely contested showdown at FuJen University.

Canadian Paruch, 37, has proved somewhat of a ‘thorne in the side’ for opposition teams in recent weeks – his two goals today taking his season's tally to 11 in all competitions after only netting four in the previous season.

This after the Flying Scotsman Patrick ‘Gordon Durie’ Swandell, 28, put Shane in the driving seat with a deft finish from a wonderfully executed corner by that man Paruch. This was a finish that leaves Scots worldwide bewildered how none of the countries strikers in history has ever scored a goal of equal or better quality.

Shane manager Sam Thompson, 16, stated in a fiery post-match interview last week that he demanded a greater killer instinct from his troops – and his team delivered a performance that was the jam spread on the top of his scone.

Setting up with a formation to counteract the danger posed by the lively number 8 in midfield and to incorporate the flair of Colombian livewires Cesar and Felipe, it was a cagey affair until Swandell ghosted in unmarked in front of the goal to hook a right footed volley into the far corner of the net.

As all the lavender and tulips were growing in the Shane garden of gameplay, it was somewhat of a surprise to see the Lions overcome the one goal deficit by scoring two quickfire goals themselves – neither of which the ever-reliable Toby Shaw in goal had a chance with. First, a scrappy right footed prod towards goal levelled the game up at 1-1, before a free kick was delightfully headed into the far corner, turning the game on its head and sending the two teams into halftime on very differing levels of emotion.

With the words of captain, leader, legend, ginger, Jamie Smith ringing in their ears, it was Shane who started the second half brighter. With the trickery of The Great Dane Patrick Krogh and the tenacity of the recently recalled Daniel Busquets looking for the key to unlock the Lions defence, it wasn’t until a wonderfully taken goal from Paruch levelled up the game at 2-2 that the game really opened up.

Chances came and went willy-nilly as both teams looked for that illusive winning goal, but it wasn’t until Jayke Langley, who was a menace all afternoon he was on the pitch, threaded a Zidane-esque ball through the defence into the path of the rampaging Paruch that the deadlock was broken. Paruch kept his composure after the initial effort was saved to send players, subs, and wags alike into raptures.

It was nothing more than a very spirited Shane deserved – despite missing a key player in the suspended James McGuirk. Shane seem to have found an able cover in the highly rated Daniel Pischedda, who gave a defensive masterclass in the short time he was on the field and would rightly feel hard done with a soft yellow card late in the game.

With an attack boasting a Pandora’s box of trickery and ability, and a tight defense, Shane go into next week in good spirits knowing that with performances like that, they will climb the league very quickly.

What they said – Shane players react:

Manager Sam Thompson, speaking to BBC Three Counties Radio:

“Oooo I was so happy I was! When the ball went in at the end WENGER OUT I just jumped up, clapped and went Yippee!! We were ever so good, such a lush performance WENGER OUT we can all be happy!”

Shane skipper Jamie Smith was equally eloquent when asked his opinions towards a cagey affair in which he was a pivotal figure:

“Aye the fo’kin wee one kicked ma hand the son of a gun aaach aye, you don’t win anythin’ wi’ kids.”

Daniel Wilkinson took to facebook to broadcast his opinion:

Bangin’ performance bredrins! We were bare sik today fam! Proper mad at the end doh init!

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